Separated at Birth? Mariners' DH and Black Hole

During his new 1 to 3 p.m. time slot at KJR-AM 950 on the Seattle radio dial, Ian Furness has been turning out one solidly reported show after another. Today, as the Mariners and Felix Hernandez prepared for an afternoon game before another packed Safeco crowd, Furness laid down some brutal numbers: Seattle DHs--can you say, Jose Vidro?--are hitting under .200 and have a collective slugging percentage of .280. The HR/RBI stats were something like 5/25.

Whoa. Maybe the Mariners should consider trading for Carlos Zambrano, the Cubs ace who could pitch for them every fourth day and hit every day. Zambrano just broke Fergie Jenkins' all-time home run record for Cubs pitchers (Jenkins was a good hitter and played a lot more years to hit his 12 homers). The Big Z has hit five dingers in Houston alone.

Not that the Cubs would trade Zambrano, but maybe Seattle should see if any pitchers on their own roster might have some bat speed. Or maybe they could rescue Micah Owings from the Arizona bullpen. I mean, you could certainly add some intrigue to a dead-zone Mariners offense by trying out pitchers at DH. 

Of course, why should Seattle management about getting any production from the DH? Nearly 40,000 fans attended each game of the Indians-M's series over the weekend and the Bosox are packing in so many fans that it feels a lot like a home game for them.

OK, one positive to report: Bryan LaHair is getting his chance at first base. He will make the best of it, and fans will be mentally penciling him for the position in 2009. He grew up a Boston fan and was thrilled to get his first hit against the Red Sox on Tuesday. Better yet for M's fans: LaHair mentioned in post-game interviews that his "whole game plan" was to go deep into counts during Tuesday's game.